Below are the 15 most recent journal entries recorded in paul's LiveJournal:

Thursday, April 28th, 2005
11:15 am	well im just here in english and i dunno, im pretty bored and im a little confused. i was talking to kiki and then she just like stopped talking to me. so i asked her what was wrong and she told me that she didnt "feel that great and she had alot on her mind... well like what?...stuff, i dont think im ready to talk to you about yet... ?...well can you at least give me a hint... well its about us." and then the bell rang and she just left. i didnt get it, should i be worried or ... i dunno but i have to go. Current Mood: confused (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, April 21st, 2005
2:37 pm	well things have been going fairly well as of late. i have just recorded my frist little demo type deal of me and my jazz band. i asked kurt to be my bass player because i think that hes a good bassist, i think the other loser that we have playing for us is stealing from the band, and i just dont like him. if any of the band has anything to say about that then go ahead, and while your at it replace me! anyway, hows life with everyone who reads my journal... all 3 of you! do any of u feel that sometimes things may just be too good to be true, im sooo paranoid, i hate it, i wish i would just stop. why do poeple envy others and try to mess things up for those they envy because they are incapable of doing it themselves, you know who yoou are. i can never seem to stop thinking about khrystyna, ill see her hair one day following her as she walks through a slight breeze, and then within like 2-3 weeks ill be walking donw the street and ill see the same beautiful image of her hair floating behind her and the sunlight reflecting off of her beautiful blue eyes, and i dunno just thinngs like that. well for now i have to go but i will try to get back and finish the rest of my entry later on tonight. bye all Current Mood: confused (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 13th, 2005
10:31 am	well right now its like 10:30 and i ve been up forever! ive just read kikis journal and i have the "warmie fuzzies!" HMMMMM!! YOU ARE A VERY INTERESTING PERSON! but its all good. right now im at danielles, i spent the night again and i had a good time. people kept calling at like 2-3 in the a.m., we were starting to get pissed off. my phone kept cutting out and i really didnt get to talk to you much, but that doesnt mean i wasnt thinking about you!"are you high?" "yea i shot up, did lines and smoked damn near a pound!" what, who, with what, what color, my underwear? green, i dunno, when? LIFE IS GOOD!! i cant wait to see you tonight, you know, to "talk." oh yea i was supposed to have a gig this weekend on 13 and ryan, but the groom got drunk and slept with a bridesmate so yea that didnt workout the way i planned. i might have one of my friends come up today before khrystyna. i cant wait to see her. shes sooo wonderful, shes really good to me and omg is she ever beautiful. she had me alittle nervous last week or the week before that when she made a phone call to someone, but i dont think i have to worry bout that anymore. im just waiting for her call. o, speaking of which i think that i gave a few poeple the wrong #. yes including you jimmy! its 627 1033, not 656! sorrry.well thats about it for right now. love you all! Current Mood: giddy (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, February 21st, 2005
12:35 am	well right now its 12:35 a.m. and im at my friend danielles house for the night. things have been a bit rough but they seem to be getting better. khrystyna and i are starting to get a little closer and i love how everyone talks bout it behind our backs like its something funny, and i also love how a certain someone likes to tell her to look out and watch herself because of my past, way to help the relationship out!poeple can be soo dumb sometimes, "i think its fuckin funny as hell!" well i think that its fuckin funny that u tell some people that u dont care, others that your pissed bout it and still others that its stupid, which is it, i hate to be a jerk but i think its time for u to let it go. if u have a problem with it tell me, dont go saying shit behind my back, and if this pisses u off, im sorry man, tough shit chew harder! im definetly coming to c ur show this weekend jimmy so be ready cause im bringing both alto and tenor. everyone writes in these journals bout thier shit and how shit things r going, buit they never take the time to ask how other people r doing, so how is everyone? me fuck it, im alive arent i, guess thats all that matters. i ve been writing alot, both music and poetry. im finally getting some pretty decent amount of giggs 200 a night plus tips between us which more times then not ends up being more than the pay. so i guess "things r looking up!"well i guess thats bout alli have to say rightbout now so goood night to all, talk to you later Current Mood: unsure,bad/good (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 9th, 2005
12:02 pm	serbs ja nemogu vise da zivim u ovom stanju. svaco me pojeba caco oni ocu! svaki dan imam novi problem sto nemogu da podnesem i samo se podvisava. zasta je zivim? sta ja i mam u mojem zivotu! ne volim ovde vise da stojim. nezam aco ja ocu vise ne da zivem uopste! i hate this fuckin place, everything i try to do for people ends up just fuckin me over in another way. nobody gives a fuck what i do anymore! there are still a select few that know that i exsist. * svaco me jebe u mozac!! i dont hve nething to look forward to at all. everything is fucked!! theres a chance that i miught be ending up going back to detriot again. back to the same shit that i used to do. i would rathere die then have that happen to me again! i want one day to come back this journal and be ableto write how wonderful my life is!!!! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
2:23 pm	well its been awhlie and still the same old story. im probably starting to annoy some poeple if any read this. Jim!!!wrie in ur damn journal!!!!!!!!!!!!! did you forget that you have one?!?!? i write more often than u and all i write is bullshit! but anyways, did u find out bout when ur parents r coming up?? oh jim by the way, andy does all of ur noises, but cannot play the trumpet worth shit!!! he says that its foxs fault for changnig his embochure! (if thats how you spell it) "now there is alot of pressure on my mouth" booo hoooo! ohh! he also says that rachel has much better tone than u!! but now that she has got her braces off u couldnt even touch her playing capabilties!!!! i have also got him into admitting that trumpets r nothing much more than piles of wasted brass!!!! he understands that trumpets r second rate instruments and that tubas, french horns, baritones, and all other brass instruments kick the shit out of trumpets!!! yes.. even cornets!!! but thats all that andy has to say. i told him to tell u this to ur face but he was too much of a chickenshit! i told him that im sure u could still do circles round him, seeing as ur in college and ur only supposed to be getting better. hey if i come up this weekend u wanted me to bring up my alto, tenor, or both? well give me a call ur wirte me an e-mail telling me whats up? thats all for now! Current Mood: silly (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 24th, 2004
12:06 pm	well tom. is turkey day, yay, ha this morning i was listening to drew and mike and there were these two guys that lost their jobs for screwing and killing a live turkey!! thats just sick, we live in a weird world!!! yesterday was the frist jazz lab thing and there are a couple of kids who have some potential to become pretty decent players, but a few, well the rest of them, kind of dont have a clue, and probably never will!... hmmm... oh we came to a decision the other day that we are going to finish up the basement and put the house up for sale, we hope to sell come spring at latest. yea so...hmm...shows how exciting my life is! oh today band sucked, i dont understand how hard it is to just stop playing when ur asked, not to talk between everything, and hey maybe, just maybe, in a great while...take ur damn instrument home and pratcice ur music! we are playing such easy music and poeple cant get the simplest of things, like shutting the fuck up!! we have PP written in our music and they are playing at a FF! come on now! think, god gave u a brain didnt he? i dunnoi jsut let things get to me too easily i guess, but well ill ttyal Current Mood: annoyed (Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
2:37 pm	well todays been yet again just another day, we have jazz lab band after school so thats something new at least. i dunno whats new with you burke, jimmy, jamie, rick, ne1? thats all for now. write me sometimes triumphspecial04@yahoo.com bye. Current Mood: bored (Comment on this)
Friday, November 19th, 2004
2:34 pm	well today i almost got into it with a kid in mid class, and im glad that i didnt, because i had a felling that i havent had in a long time and i dont know where either of us would have ended up. heres whaty happened, i was in 5th hr and everyone was talking and i was asking them the whole time to please be quiet wihle i read my book. so the hr wetn on and noone would dtop talking and i strated to get annoyed so i yelled out shutup pretty louda and this kid turns around and tells me to shut the fuck up ecause noone really cares. well at frist i thought that hewas just kidding round until he said it again. i got just a little mad and told him to fuck-off and he said the same to me, but what really got me pissed off was when he said," shut the fuck, noone gives a fuck about you." OMG!! that pissed me off sooo damn bad i stood up really fast and my chair flew across the way and i yelled at the top of my lungs "i dont care if noone gives a fuck about me!!" and i started to the kid but the teacher was like hay thats enough and i came back to myself. but everyone got really silent and kept looking at me, it was kind of weird. but man when i stood up i felt really warm and my hands were twitching real bad and i know that one of us would have been fucked up and it wouldnt have been me. but i got to get going ttyal Current Mood: morose (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 10th, 2004
2:41 pm	well in 4 days it will be the one year Anni. of the death of my friend! i still miss him when i think back at all the things we used to do. other than that really nothing has been going on in my life, im still the same old boring ass person everybody knows. but there is this one person i have found an interset in, i wish i could tell her how i felt but i guess that im afraid that she thinks of me the same way that i do. sometimes you just cant tell. i dont know, but i have to get going. ttyal. Current Mood: lonely (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 13th, 2004
11:29 am	well last night was alot of fun, my old friend from det. came all the way to capac just to hang out, it was awsome!! i was supposed to have a sectional and being a bad section leader that i am took one of my saxs out with us and kind of drink too much chocolate milk!! frist ms. joys car broke down so we had to take her home, and that s how the night started out. we made up our minds to just skip the sectional and go watch a movie.it was already like 7:45 and all the movies had already started so we called all of the movie theaters to see when the next showing was... well that was like the last one for all of the movies around here so we ended up calling the one in sterling heights . well i no i didnt write nething really interesting but i will finish later on. jimmy i will call u later to tell u over the phone everything that happened and how BWAC went! Current Mood: envious (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, August 30th, 2004
5:16 pm	well today is alittle better. i got my selmer c* today!! yay! i also got my jewel fabric in so i was really happy when i came into class this moring and fox gave it to me. o then he says make sure that u r very careful with it u as well as i know that its expensive, and i was like dont worry and i reached out for it and he goes two hands so that you dont drop it... next thing he does b4 he gives it to me was drop the damn thing! yea, "dont drop it, its very expensive!" jerk!oh and i just want you to know that i was serious when i told u to give me a call when u need to or to write me an e-mail, i will listen no matter how dumb u think it may be! you know who u r. i also got a ride from miss joy today, it was super awsome! right now im listening to edward elgar and man is his music powerful!! let me tell you, a huge mood changer, one second your fine and then all of a sudden you are feeling urself starting to get a little sad, and out of nowhere your in this enraged mood, and then depressed again and back again to the mood that u started of in. yay this thurs is our frist band performance at the foot-ball game!!! o today while in jazz band i was talking to andy w. and he told me how he is going to miss one of the games to go to a wynton marsalis perf., and i dont really blame the kid, that guy is the best!!!! i found out that he is the president as well as a teacher of the lincoln jazz academy, for jazz and improv.which is completely awsome, we came to the conclusion that we will both go! o and one more thing i was looking at a couple music conservatory campus grounds... WOW!!!!! HUGE!!maybe one day. but thats about all that i have to say right now, sry it wasent any longer! Current Mood: peaceful (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, August 26th, 2004
3:30 pm	well here i am writing yet again, boring people with my stupid emotions, but then again nobody really reads it neway so i guess that its ok, god its soooo boring here fox is out at another meeting and im watching his office til he gets back, so i guess im going to miss cross contry, o no! im sitting here listening to Inchon on his computer, its a crazy song, but at times it makes u lonely. this place is sooo dead man it sux!!! ya no...life sux just as much and more! sometimes i really wish that i wouldnt wake up in morning or that i just never existed to begin with...theres nothing to look forward to anymore im not even the best of sax players... theres nothing there... Current Mood: lonely (3 Comments |Comment on this)
11:03 am	im in the band room right now and there is absolutely noone around, fox is in a meeting and im just here by my lonesome. god i wish that things were different for me, there is just soo much crap going on in my life right now, i just really wish shit was diff. then people tell me how depressing there life is, " my parents drive a mercedes and i only get to drive a cadillac for my frist car, boo hoo hoo" yea well i had to steal my frist car. o or they will say " m parents are soo dumb they wont let me order the special on pay-per-view tonight, i dont now why it only costs $49.95" well how bout this? try instead of living without a $85,000.00 car and ppv for on night, try living without electricity for a year, without water for a year, it sux when u were some big bad-ass from school and then all of a sudden u are crying to them, begging them to let u take a shower because u havent for a fuckin week, try livib=ng without a phone or even yet without heat in the damn house!!! when u have done all that i have including that then u can talk to me about a shity life, until then grow up!!! Current Mood: gloomy (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 25th, 2004
4:10 pm	well i guess that today was ok i ran a few miles then i went to fox's office to hand out some uniforms but no1 really showed up. tom. i have to do just about the same thing, life doesnt really get any more plain. now im probably going to go practice a little, i have nothing better to do anyway. today my buddy jim is off to adrian to major in music, i wish him well. i want to major in music one day as well. its funny now that i read this i relize how boring of a person i can be, i guess when you dont want to really do anything in the frist place you kinda run out of stuff to do. but i have to get going so ill talk to everyone later. Current Mood: depressed (Comment on this)